Tag: futuristic

By Abigail Bates ('26)

Houghton University’s Moon Campus will be closing on October 1, 3909.

Houghton has officially stated that there were many issues, including the difficulties for students to adapt to the environment of the Moon, territorial disputes with other national and international colleges and universities, and the interplanetary issues involving an organization associated with students of Houghton’s Moon Campus who call themselves the STAR Empire.

The university made an official statement on September 2, 3909 that “The STAR Empire organization is not affiliated with Houghton University, therefore no legal implications of the STAR Empire’s actions can be imposed upon the institution.”

Despite this, Houghton has faced tumultuous protests and public criticism about the actions of the STAR Empire in other planets’ territories, which include, among many, hijacking and destroying supply shipments, refusal to cooperate with android and cyborg officials, and offensive posts on BlaRK against technology providers and users.

Dr. Revekstus Iedoma, a well known historian and visiting professor from O-AI University, who gave the recent lecture “The Age of ChatGPT: Its Effects on Early Society” on Wednesday the 12, said that the “closing of the Moon Campus is a result of the STAR Empire’s Moon Campus hostage situation. There’s no doubt about it.”

During the Moon Campus Hostage Situation on June 5, the STAR Empire took over Houghton’s Moon Campus and held the Moon hostage using Advanced Directed-Energy Weapons (ADEW) stolen from the Hoffman Science Center. Cullen Arndt (‘10), a Houghton student and official spokesperson of the STAR Empire, stated that the hostages and the moon would be released if both the National Council of Earth (NCE) and the Interplanetary Alliance (IA) withdrew their involvement in the interplanetary political crisis caused by the STAR Empire’s actions. Within the day, the situation was settled with the arrest of 27 students and 3 staff who were members of the STAR Empire, and the removal of the ADEWs from the Moon’s orbit. The hostages were rescued with minor injuries.

As the members were led out of the campus, they proclaimed, “Long Live Tim Martian! We are one!”

Tim Martian, founder of the STAR Empire, was a Houghton alumnus of the Class of 3820. He worked for The Houghton STAR for three years before rising to his position as Editor-in-Chief which lasted three months until his forceful removal in the Fall of 3819. 

According to an email (messages distributed by electronic means via a network) sent by the succeeding Editors-in-Chief, Neo Stitt (3820) and Kira Tiedemann (3821), Martian was removed from his position “due to his conflicting interests with the direction of The Houghton STAR, and the negative impacts of his android views on the factually credibility of the paper.”

Alia Welker (3822), an alumna who had worked in the Columns Section under Martian, said that “Tim was terrible to work with. He acted like a dictator … he even abolished our digital paper and wasted our budget on physical [paper] copies!”

When Martian’s removal from his position as the Editor in Chief was officially declared, Welker said he barricaded himself in the STAR Office for three days—without food or water—before he was dragged out. She added that he was clutching onto one of the old relics of the STAR Office, a rolling chair, as the campus security sent him to the emergency room.

“It was that crazed look in his eyes,” Welker stressed. “I just knew he would do something. I knew it right from the beginning.”

Welker reflected that because of her experiences working with Martian, she didn’t feel surprised when she saw his name appear on Galaxies Transmissions.

“Tim had always been a vengeful guy,” Welker explained. “But, you know, I never expected he would’ve created that secret organization right under our noses.”

Martian began the organization back in the 3819-3820 school year, when he was still a student at Houghton University. Although he died in a manual hover car accident only three years after graduating, the members of the STAR Empire continued to pass down his teachings. 

“We reject all malevolent technology!” Ardnt, who’s currently held in the Ceres prison, was reported to have said. “We will destroy all technology as stated in the STARBook.”

Although a copy has never been seen before, organization members claim the STARBook contains the life teachings of Martian and the origins of their mysterious chant, “We are one.”

The NCE has been attempting to locate other members of the STAR Empire since the apprehension of the students and staff after the Moon Campus Hostage Situation, but only a few have been uncovered since the investigation began (including celebrity Abvi Bats). An alert was sent out by the NCE on Galaxies Transmissions about the high likelihood of numerous secret members of the organization within the territories of Earth and other planets. Tensions have begun to rise on BlaRK in response to the possible threat the STAR Empire poses to the treaties between Earth and other planets, with Houghton University and its affiliates receiving the hardest judgements and surveillance. In spite of this, Houghton has maintained its stance on the situation and continues to operate.

“While Houghton University bears no responsibility for the Moon Hostage Crisis, we have no plans to reopen the Moon Campus program and intend to follow all new NCE mandates,” President Joshua Carpenter stated. “However, there are many future programs currently underway that students can look forward to.” ★