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Inclusive Dialogue: Being Queer at Houghton

HollyChaissonRGBAs I stated at the beginning of the semester, I want The Star to serve as a platform for the sustained dialogue that is vital to any healthy and thriving community. Overall, Houghton has done remarkably well in this area, embodying both openness and receptivity even in the face of more controversial issues. In the spirit of this, The Star has decided to publish a series of editorials concerning the LGBTQ experiences of Houghton alumni.

These editorials are an opportunity for those who have been perhaps routinely unheard to add their voices to the campus dialogue.For some, these editorials may prove challenging, yet I want to emphasize that The Star is committed to maintaining not only a safe platform for disparate opinions to meet and perhaps clash, but an equal-opportunity platform as well. As always, I want to encourage you, my readers, to join in the conversation.

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The conversation at Houghton surrounding sexuality and the Community Covenant has been vigorous over the last few semesters. At times it has been constructive, and at other times it has been ineffective and even hurtful. This is to be expected in a community of roughly a thousand flawed peopleNonetheless, if we are to make progress as a community in how we talk about LGBTQ sexualities and gender identities, we must remember that behind the issues are real, flesh-and-blood people with feelings.

Mary Cronin RGBThat is the task of this series: putting faces to the issues. Every two weeks, we will hear from a Houghton alumnus on what it meant for them to be LGBTQ during their time here. These men and women have shared their stories because they care about this community-and hope to see it become a place where everyone can thrive.

That being said, allow me to commence this series with my own story.

I did not admit to anyone that I am gay until I was 17 years old, halfway through my first semester at Houghton College. The months after that first confession were filled with anxiety, because I knew that by and large my academic and faith community at Houghton would not accept this part of me. I believe the dissonance which many in the Houghton community perceive between Christianity and LGBTQ sexualities is perpetuated by inaccurate language, such as in the Houghton College Community Covenant.

I think most of us, whether we are gay, straight, bisexual, transgender, queer, or anywhere in between, can agree that we are whole human beings with many complex layers fully known only by our Creator. As emerging adults, we realize that we are more than our sexualities. While we may feel confident or insecure about this aspect of ourselves, when it comes down to it, sexuality is as matter of fact as brown hair or glasses. Our sexualities are just as intimately understood and loved by the Creator as is every other aspect of our being.

mary.hollyYet, I don’t think that the Community Covenant we all signed as first year students fully reflects that truth when it addresses sexuality. The Community Covenant’s only words addressing people like me are: “We believe that Scripture clearly prohibits certain acts… (including premarital sex, adultery and homosexual behavior)”.

In essence, the community I am a part of has responded to me with “don’t.” Sometimes this community has responded to me with “EEEEWWW”, “dyke”, and “are you still a Christian?”

           We can assume that the “straightforward” meaning of the Covenant language is “don’t have sex with a person of your sex or gender identity.” But this presents problems. Every single day on this campus I and other LGBTQ students are having our full personhood reduced. Our sexual and gender identities are being unfairly reduced to sex acts, to be affirmed or forbidden.

The Community Covenant recognizes the beauty of heterosexual romance (minus extra-marital sex acts) because it affirms the full personhood of straight couples. I hope that soon the Houghton community will be ready to embrace the humanity of same-sex couples, without feeling the need to sexualize them. (A good number of us do strive to remain chaste until marriage, which is more than I can say of many straight couples who have passed through this campus.)

I am not advocating a change in the language of the Covenant because I want to feel secure in holding a romantic partner’s hand on the quad or open up about a girlfriend, though that would be nice. I am advocating a change because I desperately want all current and incoming students to feel safe, affirmed, and whole on this campus. I want first year students to be open about their authentic selves without having to fear questioning or isolation. I want this community to be able to separate sexuality and romance from sex acts, and sex acts from debauchery.

Therefore, as the Community Covenant issue continues to be debated, remember this: LGBTQ students are not an issue that one must form “right” opinions about. We are children of God, striving to “do justly, love mercy, and walk humbly”-just like other Houghton students.